Just saw a post about bring family members in to the scene. I have mixed emotions about this subject. I’m a mother of an adult child and have a story to tell.
My daughter is not happy about my life choice of BDSM and that I’m as public as I am. She feel what we do is not right. I had a submissive and did a collaring ceremony at the Lair many years ago and when she found out she was mad at me for not inviting her. I knew how she felt about the all this and felt that she would not be a happy camper at the Lair. Watching me put a collar someone’s neck.
So months later I was celebrating my birthday at the Lair and I knew she was going out of town so I invited her. I knew she would not come but I was so wrong. Kane the owner of the Lair de Sade came and got me and said someone was outside that was not a member and wanted to come into my birthday party. When I walked out front there was my daughter and boyfriend with big smiles on their faces. I turned red knowing well enough that she would not enjoy this evening at all. She got an eye full that night and her boyfriend got a kick out all of this but this was really not her cup of tea. When the time came for my slave/boyfriend to take my spankings my daughter said it was time for her and her boyfriend to leave.
In the last 20 years she had been to the Lair two times afterwards once on Halloween and once for a fundraiser for TSRnetwork.com our Live TV Network about BDSM. Watching her is like watching ants crawl all over her body and she is tied up. She is not kinky at all and I can tell on her face that is not a happy place for her.
My daughter calls us “you people” and looks down on what we do. So I’m public person in BDSM and she hates what I do. There is nothing I can do to convince her that we are normal people and not twisted mother fuckers that just are wracked out of our minds.
It’s not my job to convince her or to introduce her to my life choice, she lives her life to her own rules and interest. As her mother I have been a very good single mom that raised an amazing young woman that I’m so proud of.
She respects me and I respect her and I keep my life choice away from her because she feels very uncomfortable around all of this. She did not have an easy time being raised by a mother that thought out of the box as I was never a soccer mom and always a bit different.
I don’t believe it’s our job to bring our family members into BDSM but if they do come into the lifestyle on their own than we can be open about talking about this. Everyone has to make their own choice and if they are meant to be in this life choice they will find their way.
I respect my daughter choice and know this is not her thing so our family dinners are very vanilla and calm. I have to think about all of the people in my family that this could affect not just me. What I do is a choice and I protect her of people finding out. Most of us in this life style know each other but don’t really know our real name and we tend to keep it that way to protect our love ones. We call life choice Safe, Sane and Consensual because many of us try to keep our love ones safe from people knowing and judging them. This is what you do when you love your family and would never want to cause them harm in any way. My kink is not my daughter’s kink and protect her first and me second. It has always been this way and it will never change. We tell our sub’s that we hurt you but never harm you but with my daughter I will never hurt her or harm her in any way, that’s what mother’s do.
Thanks for reading this and walk in peace, love, joy and kink,
Rev Mel